Saturday, March 29, 2003


Another market place was hit today, although by what and by whom it's difficult to say. America denies any knowledge of the incident, shifting the blame instead to 'dishonourable Iraqi tactics' and, presumably, those weapons of mass destruction they'd hidden under an apple cart. Whatever the case there were fifty civilians injured this time...and fifty more killed outright. Meanwhile a suicide bomber driving a taxi in downtown Iraq has killed five American soldiers. Dubya described the incident as illustrating the difference between decent, traditional American warfare and disgusting, slimy, brown-headed Iraqis' evil smelling murder tactics. Back home the war office, or the cabinet, or some other such Government department, has apologised for Tony Blair's use of the phrase "executed". They ought to be apologising for a damned sight more than that.


According to the inference of Donald Rumsfelt this time last week the Iraqi regime was supposed to have fallen by now, three civilians at the most would have died, Saddam's head would be being paraded through the streets of Baghdad this morning on the end of a stick carried by liberated towel-heads eating McDonalds burgers and offering their genitals to Coalition forces with enormous gratitude. Instead the invasion is stuck at Umm Qsar, which itself is far from secure yet. Millions face starvation across Iraq because the aid can't get through. And, if the Iraqi Minister for Information is to be believed, British soldiers are now bombing the crap out of Bahsrhah's food stores. Actually I thought they'd bombed the Information Ministry this morning but obviously not. ("It was that place with all the stalls in it and loads of people milling about, wasn't it Sarg?")


To say that the war is going badly would be wrong. It's already gone bad. Now it's getting worse. And if the fuck up hasn't wiped the smug grin from Bush's face (he doesn't understand what's happening yet so he's still wandering around with a hard on feeling superior to everybody else) then it's certainly starting to show on Tony Blair's haggard mush. If Uncle Tony had found himself between a desert and a hard case before he's now sinking in a quagmire of murder, mayhem, illegality and faltering public opinion. He might not have expected this. But most of the rest of us did. The fact that he wouldn't listen and arrogantly lead Britain towards this grimy fate it would appear is starting to dawn on him. His sticky-out ears are starting to flag. His jowls are drooping. His skin has become ashen and his cheeks withdrawn. And you could almost hear what he was thinking at the Camp David press conference the other day. "For fuck's sake George...don't say anything. The British people won't buy it...please keep your mouth shut...you're making me look like a tit." Well you are a tit, Tony...and that's about the only smidgen of truth we can be certain of these days.