Everyone knows the lovely orange pussycat. And someone would like to kill it.
The garfield project: die, garfield, die.
Editor's note: He's not the only one who would rather see Garfield dead...
Deputy Editor notes disturbing evidence of a Faustian contract.
Click to see what G******d is doing over Xmas, and why the Editor
hocked his immoral soul to get a slice of the Surprise Show action.
The news delivery boy's note: stop this cat, before it overruns the world.
EDITOR'S NOTE: POSITION OF DEPUTY EDITOR AT THIS BLOGGER BOARD SOON TO BE VACANT! ANYBODY WHO FANCIES A GO PLEASE CONTACT ME AT THE USUAL ADDRESS WITH THE SUBJECT LINE: "I THINK TERRY SEDGWICK DESERVED THE SACK BECAUSE..."
Could applicants for the position of Deputy Editor please send their resumes as expeditiously as possible. The former Deputy Editor commenced his new position last Wednesday as Deputy to the Director of Customer Relations at the Lancashire Virtual Office of British Gas, Mr. Ken Russell. Before the Editor attempts to change the security settings on this blog denying me my inalienable, indivisible and indisputable posting rights, might I advise him that in my new role I have been afforded unlimited discretionary powers by Mr. Russell in regards to the functionality (or otherwise, if one chooses to catch my drift) of meter No. 314-438/21a.
As a wily statesman once said (I think it was Bruce Talleyrand) ... "A meter is a long time in office politics" or as our wonderfully talented Director/God Mr. Russell is oft wont to say in his inimitably succinct manner, "Better The Devils you know and love as wonderful cinema than the ones with whom you ought sup with a long spoon which never did run away with the dish full of nuns so blind as those who will not see the forest for the trees who always listen to me, but if there's no one there, they themselves make no noise. The lion will lie down with silence of the lamb."
Editor's note: Would the deputy editor please take note that his demands are unreasonable and would cause grievous harm to the public sector of this blog if met? Holding my meter to ransome in this disgraceful manner is senseless and immature, putting the shelf life of my gas fire (and numerous others) at considerable risk. At present the British Army is coping with the pressure of Gas Meter Fittings, but would be better suited to serving the public in their true capacity of killing Iraqi peasants. If the deputy editor is serious about negotiations then he should join us at the negotiating table instead of using these dangerous and pre-Thatcherite tactics.
"Join you at the negotiating table?" Ha! Fat chance! As Allende said to Pinochet ... "Over my dead body!!"
(Or was that what the Bishop said to the actress playing a choirboy?)
