Thanks to the miracle of modern technology and plenty of promotion we've finally received our first 'Hate Comment' (see the comments board at bottom of this page). Well done everyone! It's taken a lot of hard work but we've finally made it to celebrity status. I'd like to take this opportunity to thank all my fellow ranters for their efforts and reflect upon the fact that I told you we'd get there in the end.
In response to the 'Find Happiness' instruction that our uncynical cousin left us, I have this to say. Happiness (other than being a humorous play on the words 'a penis' in Peter Sellers' films) is actually a myth. Happiness cannot be found in God, sex or football. (Although in the case of sex it's worth persevering on the off chance.) Momentary distractions from reality can be uncovered in all sorts of self-delusions. A thirteen bedroom mansion for example. A fifty volume collection of 'Big Jugs Monthly'. The unexpected death of John Prescott in a road accident involving a tanker full of Lyon's Golden Syrup and an inflatable dolphin. But life continues regardless. Politicians keep on lying. Religious zealots keep on bullshitting. American producers continue to make wank programmes. Gallbladders continue to gall. Decent people die. Evil babies are born. And ITV celebrities continue their sexual perversions in full view of the Special Branch with headline making results.
What makes me happy? Being a grumpy old shit, that's what. To me the ignorant killing of innocent people in Iraq matters more than blissful ignorance. The hypocrisy of governments, the commercialisation of everything that walks, breathes and dies, the blandness of our cultural state, the crushing of the poor, the mistreatment of underdogs and the exposure of the thoughtlessly greedy...all these things matter. Turning a blind eye to all of these things, in my opinion, is not an option. The day they get sorted then I might be happier. Not completely happy...but a few steps closer. Until that time the nearest I can get is expressing my opinion on such subjects.
What makes Roger happy? Obviously not this board, that's for certain. So, a word of advice then, Roger. Fuck off and look for your elusive happiness somewhere else. I'm sure there are plenty of sites out there full of kittens and Mr Men and Baby Jesus quotations to keep you smiling whilst the rest of the world goes up in smoke.
'Nuff said. Rant over.
