ALL THE NEWS THAT'S FIT TO HIT THE CUTTING ROOM FLOOR.

Hundreds of troops ring Heathrow, fearing terror attacks

In London more than 400 troops with armoured vehicles have taken up positions at Heathrow airport, amid fears of an Al-Qaeda attack.

In a statement, the Metropolitan Police said its unexpected decision to call in the British army to guard Heathrow -- the world's busiest international airport -- was "precautionary".

The use of troops has been authorised by Prime Minister Tony Blair.

Chicken bin Little Blair has been taken in for questioning and a good going over with a rubber hose.

Outdated combat gear on frigates

By IAN McPHEDRAN, defence reporter
12feb03

"A navy warship carrying more than 180 Australian sailors on patrol in the Gulf will be at risk if war breaks out because it is fitted with a 1970s era combat system.

The so-called fire control system on board the guided missile frigate HMAS Darwin is so out of date that the ship is unable to defend itself from aerial attack under certain weather and sea conditions.

ADI said it had a solution for the combat system and the system had passed factory acceptance testing. It blamed complex navy specifications for the delay.

Upgrade work will start in September this year and ADI expects to finish by 2007."

I gather the main delay was caused by a short supply of industrial strength vinegar and brown paper. American Vice president and part time British Prime Minister Chuck Blair has hastily arranged an emergency despatch of bicycle tyre repair kits for the Australian Navy. The carrier pigeons are scheduled to arrive with their payloads sometime in 2005.

War mad, says ex-defence head

By IAN McPHEDRAN, defence reporter
12feb03

A retired defence chief has accused the Howard Government of madness in pursuing war against Iraq.

Former Chief of Defence Admiral Alan Beaumont said there was no justification for war without United Nations backing, and little justification for war with it.
He also warned the military campaign could be long and bloody and attacked the Government for promoting a low-casualty operation.

"This is bloody mad," Admiral Beaumont told the Herald Sun yesterday. "I don't understand how it is in the national interest to kow-tow to the US."

Retired Major-General Alan Stretton said he could not understand why Australia was meekly following the US to war.

To the plank at dawn with these unpatriotic bastards.

Bush counts Aussies in anti-Iraq coalition

"Mr Bush said Mr Howard was a close, personal friend and a man of clear vision.

"He's a man grounded in good values and I respect him a lot, and I'm glad he's back here in the Oval Office," Mr Bush said.

Mr Howard said it was self evident that Australia was part of Mr Bush's coalition.

"Self evidently Australia has demonstrated a level of involvement and commitment and willingness beyond most other countries," Mr Howard said.

But he insisted that Australia would still be able to withdraw.

Mr Bush and Defence Secretary Donald Rumsfeld both emphasised the Howard Government had the final say on Australia's possible military commitment.

But it was widely reported in the US that Australia has signed up to fight with America regardless of any UN endorsement."

"he insisted that Australia would still be able to withdraw." It would take a 10 ton tractor to pull the Maggot's brown nose from where it is currently planted, and the upgrade work on the tractor is not due to start until September this year and is expected to be finished by 2007 at the earliest.

Crean, US ambassador to meet again

Federal Opposition leader Simon Crean has called another meeting with the US ambassador as the row continues over Labor's position on Iraq.

Mr Crean has accused the ambassador of unprecedented interference in Australian politics, as further comments by Tom Schieffer are published today.

The ambassador says Labor's handling of its position on Iraq is a rank appeal to anti-Americanism.

Mr Schieffer has issued a statement saying he looks forward to meeting with Mr Crean again but a spokesman says he is receiving medical treatment today.

Keep taking the tablets Tom.

Why we should fight Iraq: Bush

During a news conference yesterday with Prime Minister John Howard after their meeting at the White House, the president was asked: "There are many Australians and others who are still not convinced that they should be going to war with you. At this late stage, what's your personal message to them?"

"In this country and in Australia people believe that everybody has got worth, everybody counts, that everybody is equal in the eyes of the Almighty. So the issue is not only peace, the issue is freedom and liberty.

"I made it clear in my State of Union - and the people of Australia must understand this - I don't believe liberty is America's gift to the world; I believe it is God's gift to humanity."

Keep taking the tablets George.

Sorry to take your attention away from the big issues by the above postings. Here are the headlines that really count and dominate our newspapers today.

Behold a nation in shock and mourning.

"SHANE WARNE faces a possible two-year ban that could end his stellar cricket career after testing positive to a banned drug. The champion leg spinner had tested positive for diuretics - drugs often used to help weight loss or as masking agents for other drugs, a leading sports doctor said."

       

"Shane Warne's drag drug bombshell"

"A champs future up in air"

"Mates rally round stunned spin king"

"Warne's quick return after injury"

"Aussies still good bet for Cup"

"Warne's statement in full"

"Text of ACB chief's speech"

"ACB media release on Warne"

"Career highs and lows"

"I am shocked: Warne"

"I want to play"

On a personal note. Despite the grief I currently feel at the demise of this great Australian sportsman (I assume by the headlines he must be dead) I am going to dry my eyes, chin up, put on a brave face and march. Not since LBJ's (and doesn't he look like a peace loving, measured intellectual now!) visit to Australia at the height of the Vietnam debacle have I been moved to demonstrate, but on Friday Mr. and Mrs. Sedgwick and all the little Sedgwick wombat children are off to a Rally for Peace. (5 p.m. Friday 14 February State Library Swanston St. Melbourne. Ladies a placard.) BE THERE OR BE SQUARE! (Sorry about that but I can't shake off the heady days of my youth in the 60's. I remember them so clearly ... if only I could remember for what I went to the corner store this morning and why I forgot to put on trousers and underpants.)

On a deeply personal note I have found a wonderful critique from one of my adoring fans.

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR ( The Mercury (Tasmania, Australia) ) ; 11-20-2002
"Can somebody please, please tell Terry Sedgwick (The Feral Eye) that he is not funny."
Peter Hayes
Bellerive

Thank you Peter. That's what humorless people used to say about Torquemada. Your Semtex is in the mail. It's sure to put a smile on your face. Lucky I don't hold grudges.
P.S. "And if thine eye cause thee to offend, pluck it out."