Latest News as seen on British Television: The Queen is in hospital tonight recovering from an operation on her hip. Apparently she twisted her leg during a fall at the horse races over Christmas. She is said to be '...doing fine...' and is expected to back home by tomorrow at the latest.

Yeah? So what? Exactly how is this trivial bit of frippery news?

Here's some real news for all those celebrity-worshippers working in television...the rest of us don't give a flying fuck. If she'd have broken her neck then at least it might have been an amusing anecdote to close on. If, by this experience, she'd had an epiphany and divided her estates amongst the down-trodden tax-payers of the so-called Commonwealth then that might have been somewhat more interesting. The story, such as it is, however, doesn't even constitute a side-line in Private Eye. (And that's saying something!)

Grow up you arse-kissing, sycophantic bastards and earn your licence fee for once.