Monday, September 09, 2002

There is a lot of anti-American talk going on here, and as a healthy, double-barreled, red-blooded American I feel I must step in and make some important points. I was taught in 3rd grade Geography the fact that the United States covers 97% of the surface of the planet. So all you people from other countries are only representing 3% of the Earth. I should also point out that I was raised in the Catholic School System, and in the 3rd grade when I wasn't listening to a monstrous, sexually -frustrated 123 year-old Nun lecturing me about Geography, I was spending my time in the Rectory with Father O'Sullibrian who considered me his favorite little altar-boy. he told me I had a great future in The Church because my oral skills were beyond those of all the other 3rd grade altar-boys.

I hope my points help clear up the perspective on these issues of those of us that inhabit most of the planet. Thank you.