Michael Jackson, the lily-white pop starlet, has disappeared following a warrant issued for his arrest on multiple child abuse allegations. "We've no idea where he's hiding. That's the thing about Jackson," said a spokesman for the California police. "He just blends in with the crowd."
Meanwhile in Turkey terrorists have blown up the HSBC building. "This is a deliberate attack on Britain," said Tony Blair after wiping George Bush's semen from his chin at a press conference this afternoon. "The HSBC...otherwise known as the Hong Kong and Shanghai Banking Corporation...is a well known British target."
A second bomb also exploded in the British Embassy in Turkey this morning, killing twenty-five people. In a statement to the press, David Blunkett said, "We cannot tell you whether the British Ambassador was killed or not until we've informed his family."
Well done David...