Wednesday, January 28, 2004

Hutton dressed up as Spam...

Calls have been made for an inquiry into allegations that the Hutton Report was 'sexed-up' in favour of the British government. Angry protestors, having dismissed the report as a great big 'whitewash', are now demanding a full investigation, claiming that Hutton deliberately ignored testimonials from Robin Cook and Claire Short.
Said a spokesman for the general public, "This report has been deliberately fabricated to mislead parliament in order to save Tony Blair's rubbery neck. Ultimately it has lead to the death of Andrew Gilligan's career."
"The whole thing is a total fabrication of the facts," said Mr Hogwart, owner of the Fisherman's Arms tonight. "We all know that Blair's a bullshitter an' no poncy mate of 'is 'oo claims he's an ex-judge can palm us off with a load of arse-lickin' lies."
After several more pints Hogwart added, "This seriously calls into question the legal system. Some of those stuck-up, wig-covered heads ought to roll."
Bowing to demand for the immediate inquiry into the Hutton affair Tony Blair has appointed Alistair Campbell to spearhead the investigation in order to preserve integrity and approach the subject from an unbiased point of view.