Wednesday, July 02, 2003

Attention, Earthlings!

Hello, people of planet earth. May name is Zarblaf and I am putting my life in danger by posting on this blog. My people have been visiting and studying your planet for a long, long time. We live by a rule to keep our presence a secret, and to avoid communicating with lifeforms on Earth as much as possible. So I am breaking these rules to now communicate with you, and to help you understand some things that humans have never understood. I hope to reach out to whoever frequents this blog for the purpose of enlightening a few humans with some basic truths that all humans need, a whole, you ignorant fuckers are RUINING a wonderful planet.

Now, you may wonder why I am providing this valuable service on Brian Hughes' blog. Well, it's not that I feel I can reach the most people here. It's more because Brian doesn't seem to give a hedgehog's fuck WHAT gets posted here. I thank you in advance, Sir Hughes, for allowing me to use this space on your blog.

I'll start slow, and try not to overwhelm you with too much all at once. So, for our first lesson, here's the number one problem that causes humans to do so much damage to their world and each other...religious beliefs. Every fucking religion ever created on the planet earth is a fairy tale. Early civilizations wanted, rightly so, to answer questions about the universe. And without any knowledge of reality, every civilization fabricates their own creation stories and gods to answer these questions. Don't feel bad. EVERY civilization on every planet in the universe does this. It's natural. The problem comes when these beliefs and traditions and persecutions are clung to long after scientific research proves that they are based on ridiculous stories. Religion becomes too easy of a means to control others and rule over their minds and possessions, so religious leaders want to keep starting their wars and preaching their silly doctrine forever.

My first lesson for all of you is to IMMEDIATELY let go of your religion. Stop going to that church or temple. You Christians especially need to just give the whole fucking stupid thing up. The "God" of the Bible is a stupid fuckhead who doesn't understand the universe, as is clearly established in the Old Testament where the Sick Fuck spends most of the time coming up with new ways to punish people with the most violent, sickening acts possible. The New Testament is a bunch of different misinterpretations of the same pointless story. Was there really a Jesus? Yes. He was born to a young tart knocked-up before she should have been and this was covered up by a stupid story that Jesus believed his entire life, that he was immaculately conceived by God. This caused a huge amount of confusion once Jesus got old enough to realize that all he really wanted to do was suck cock. And so he spent the rest of his life with his homosexual friends getting fucked worshipfully up the ass until he was killed because of the stupid "Son of God" stories they kept telling and the fake "miracles" they kept staging. After the crucifixion, his friends burnt his remains away and continued for years to convince weak-minded people that he had been a god to hide the homosexual, pointless truth of his life. How all of you can still be falling for this to this day is amazing to me. Let it go.

So you may ask...what should I believe, then? We'll deal with this as time goes on. For now, just stop going to your assenine churches, giving them your hard-earned money while they play with the genitals of your children.