Legendary Soul Mountain Barry White...RIP (and that's just the sound of his underpant elastic giving up the ghost.) It's going take more than sexual healing to get out of this one.
Meanwhile Tony bin Bastard has expressed reservations today that the American government is planning a 'Kangaroo' court for two British terrorist suspects kept at Guantanamo Bay. The prisoners are both facing illegal hearings and possible execution. Said Uncle Tony, "Still...at least kangaroos have a better sense of judgement than the chimpanzee who's running the show."
In Iraq the liberated population continue to celebrate their independence by shooting American soldiers. Since the war ended more than 300 American liberators have died in combat and riots are regularly witnessed on the streets.
"They're just happy to be free," said Colonel Arnie Ringpiece as he struggled to subdue an Iraqi child beneath his boot. "God bless American justice."