Tuesday, April 29, 2003

What gives with that 'Direct Line' advert? The one where some bloke pulls up in a clapped-out camper van and his wife says, "I'm not getting in that!" Then up comes some ruddy-faced council-estater and starts wittering on about how she got a loan from 'Direct Line' for her cruddy old kitchen.
"So what's the problem?" you ask. Well, correct me if I'm wrong, but the final scene shows the council-estate tart climbing into a brand new Porsche or something with the aforementioned twat, snogging him and then allowing him to drive away whilst his wife looks sadly on from her living room window.
What exactly are 'Direct Line' trying to tell us? Borrow a huge amount of money and be skint for the rest of your life and you too can have an affair with an ugly old sow from the wrong end of the street?
Callously screw your new bird in front of your ex-Missus just because she didn't want to borrow thousands of quid from some wank-hole lending agency?
It's almost as dreadful an advert as the one where the worst actress in creation ever is bemoaning her fate and the second worst actress in creation ever is listening to her. The first old sow is up to her eyeballs in debt. Can't pay the mortgage. Having to sell her liver to buy shoes for the kids. Hiring out her nipples to scientific research. The humanity!
And her friend's advice? Get another huge loan! Well...that should do it, love! Great idea that!
So, of course, she does.
And the next minute she's loading up the boot of a brand new car...a brand, spanking new, £30,000 car...at the back of Sainsbury's with unnecessary crap.
"Oh yes...and we had enough left over to stupidly buy this poser mobile. Bollocks to keeping some money tucked aside for a rainy day. We're completely crap with money and Western Finance have allowed us to be even more reckless and pathetic. That's why we ended up fiscally fucked in the first place."
Stupid bellends!
I'm sick of all these "solve your debt problems easily" adverts nowadays. Just try not spending so much money on new cars you peer-group pressured bastards.
And for fuck's sake, leave the putrid skanks from the council estates alone!