Thursday, April 10, 2003

Editor's note: As a one time anti-war converted to a jubilant, pro-Bush Iraqi liberator...I am deeply ashamed of my previous stance. I realise that I was wrong ...

Deputy Editor's note: I second the Editor's motion. Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. (Punches himself in the head with a "Russell Crowe Special".) Winners are grinners and losers can go get nicked. I have now chosen to sport a smile from cauliflower ear to cauliflower ear. Run the Stars and Stripes up the pole and let's see who salutes. ("Names and addresses of those who don't, please Private Pike")

Gone are the days of my reading rubbish like THIS! From now on I shall be embedded in this site which points out the awfulness of the Anti War protests ...

"Hold your protests if you will, but keep in mind the frightened young Marine, who holds your rights in his hands, and undauntingly faces his task. He is the true hero of democracy. In all your coming days, as you see our Nation's flag raised in honor wherever you may be (Let's hold that thought one more time) , remember that young Marine, and the hundreds of thousands like him who put their life on the line for you. Remember them, and may your conscience never let you live down the shame you have earned by betraying them today."

"We had a great day," Sergeant Schrumpf said. "We killed a lot of people."

"I wanna get in there and get my nose dirty," Private AJ said. "I wanna take revenge for 9/11."

N.B. I make this statement of my own free will in the sure and certain knowledge that the Editor's threat of withdrawal of my staple gun privileges, summary execution of my family and being locked up in a cell full of rats bore no influence on my seeing of the light.

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the liberators;

They are trampling out the vintage where the weapons of mass destruction probably are'nt ... might be ... anyway we don't have time to look for them 'cos we're too busy liberating, raising flags and giving away cigarettes, gum, Coke, nylon stockings and photo opportunities are stored;

They hath loosed the fateful lightning of their benevolent swift sword;

Their truth is marching on. Catch it on "Fox News" at 6.30.

We, the underphotoed members of the ROTW staff stand four square behind the Editor.

"The Editor is a faithful Shepherd.
He has led us to green pastures and still waters.
He has led us in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.
We have seen goodness of the Editor in the land of the living.
Let us thank the Editor with our offerings."
(Cooper, I think you still owe him a pair of khaki Y fronts from the last game of strip cribbage.)